sentiment

cupcake is feeling a little sappy tonight. some longing. some sadness.
what is this new year to bring? which adventure awaits? where am i willing to go and do? what do i want?
i often say, "i just want to be happy", but, what makes happy?

i wish a better new year to all my friends. you all have carried me throughout this year, and probably longer .... i am most appreciative of my fortune(s). i do realize my luck, and i am most grateful. thank you.

drinking for a cause. really!

sutter home wine is not my first choice for drinking, but when shopping for cheap wine, i noticed the sutter home wines had a special tag hanging around the neck. for each foil top sent in, they are donating a dollar to help find a cure for breast cancer. the offer ends at the end of this year, so, i better drink up fast, and then find a new cause for drinking.

we have light!

finally, after weeks of darkness, i can see the fishes again!



i took my box from marineland over to petsmart, to test out a new bulb in the new hood/light. it seems that my problem with my previous set up was indeed the light fixture, because, the bulb i thought was broken worked fine in the "new" hood. hmmm .... which also means my other bulb was probably fine, and it's long gone in the trash. but, i did not have to pay for these new parts. whew!

i was excited about being able to see the fish again, so i bought them (me) some new aquarium toys. i found a small section of an aquarium backdrop on sale for 50 cents, from which i was able to cut out two backdrops for my small set up, and i got a couple of new plants. the new plants are probably too big, but i just wanted to see something different in my tank. and, it gives the fishes more places to hide. i'll have to clean their tank and do a water change before christmas.





my first batch of paperwhites finally grew so tall that some of the stalks flopped over. these grew to 24" tall!

my first batch of paperwhites has fully bloomed. i love their fragrance. my second batch is not nearly as tall as this group, and will likely bloom within the week. i think being near a cold window kept the second batch smaller.

i've been eating soups from the freezer a lot lately, but mostly the veggie & beef soup. i need to find some more soup recipes to try out. i like the convenience of having something already made, that's nutritional and delicious too. when i go home for christmas, i will be taking my 1/2 paper sack full of pecans with me, and some recipes i printed out for pecan pie. the trick is to not make one that is overly sweet.

not much else to report. it's super cold in here, though i'm sure my ceiling is toasty warm. my fishes are still in the dark because the marineland people don't know how to ship a light bulb (but, i talked with someone at petsmart and they said i could exchange my bulb!). ... so, stay tuned for fishy fotos ....

such is (home)life

my paperwhites are ready to bloom! this is the first batch that i set up, when things were a little warmer around here. i look forward to their scent ....



this batch was just set into rocks and water yesterday. i had gone back to the nursery to buy some more bulbs, then went to the thrift store to buy some more jelly jars for the bulbs. though the presentation won't be as dramatic as a bunch growing together, they could make nice little gifts with a red ribbon tied around the glass, ... or, i can just scatter them around my home and enjoy their fragrance.



there's a pretty glassblown christmas ball hanging in the window with those paperwhites ... i bought a few many years ago from the gallery at penland. if you ever have an opportunity to go there (as a student or visitor), you must!







they catch the morning light coming through the kitchen windows.... now, these cute bells came from the nursery. i got one each for my niece and nephews. i'm sure i like them much more than they will. kids!







two pretty creatures from the aquarium

and, i found more of these in a secret location! these are even bigger and fatter than the other pecans i picked up before ....

it keeps calling

i'm feeling a little weepy today. i, on occasion, check my pocketmail account, and found, last week, (don't you love 'commas'?), a message from bearbait.

"I wish you and your family a wonderful Thanksgiving. I thank you for your friendship this past spring and enjoyed meeting you. Stay well and the best of what life gives.
I hope our hiking paths cross once again.
BearBait"

and then, i went onto trailjournals.com and found that one of my previous hiking buddies is going out on the trail again. and, i want to go too! i do. i don't know why. it's just a calling.

it's very emotional. i don't know why i, or anyone, feels the need to walk 2000+ miles. i only walked about 500 miles last time, before i was distracted.
i just need to talk to solace. maybe he can calm me down.

well, that's how i'm feeling today.

(hours later)........ and, solace did calm me down.

i'm ready!

i was absent from my home for about five days when i went to spend thanksgiving with my parents. i turned the heat off (not that we've needed the heat here much lately), watered my plants, and gave my fishes some algae wafers. upon my return, i noticed that my paperwhites had grown about 3 inches! they've seriously shot up, but seem to not grow at all since i've been back.
don't they look nice with the needles? i have a couple more bulbs in little jelly jars up on the window ledge.




i also got my tree up the day after i returned home. this tree is new to me, though it's an evergleam from the 50's. i had another tree before, also aluminum, but a certain X attacked it, and quite damaged it, and i can't bare to look at it anymore. i need to set it up though, and photograph it, so i can sell it on ebay. it's ready for its next life.

so, this year, my mom surprised me with a new tree, and we even found some vintage looking ornaments for to replace the ones that were broken/lost from the attack.

these are awesome! i got these lights from lowe's ... three snowflakes on one strand, and they flicker. they don't just flash off and on, but hey look like little twinkley stars. i like them a lot. i strung these up on the front porch, the balcony that faces the street. i took a little walk around the house this evening, just as twilight was passing, to admire my lights from the street. a passerbyer hollered out from his car that he liked the lights :) my apt. is in a house on a busy street during commuting hours.



and here's one of my favorite possessions ... she lives over my bed.
i love you troll!

home again!

and my fishes were in a cloud of cloudiness! i had tossed in some 'algae wafers' at the recommendation of the idiots at petsmart, though, everything i read online said i didn't need to feed the fishes at all during my absence, and i came home to find a couldy tank. whaaaa!

so, after doing the essentials (ie: getting stuff out of truck, peeing, pouring a glass of wine) ... i changed the water. i only did about a 1/2 change, so, it's still on the semi-couldy side, but, better. i changed the filter too, so maybe it will look even better by tomorrow. i'll test the chemicals tomorrow too.

it was cold in here when i got home, and warm and unseasonably balmy outside, so, my windows were fogged. and, the fishy water was cold. i fed them too, so i hope they're happy i'm home. i also got the spare parts to fix their light. that's what i miss --- seeing them under the light tube.

well, i have a lot of things to unpack ... a cooler full of food, clothes, knitting, and christmas decorations. i can't wait to get things looking like christmas in here :)

i'll post some pictures tomorrow --- and my paperwhites have shot up!

oh, the holidays ....

or, should i call them the holidaze ? i really do love this time of year, and get extra angry when something makes it less than perfect. or, if a certain someone makes things suck! it's been almost 2 years now, and i feel like my X is still punishing me for something i did, that had nothing to do with him, before we were a couple. and now we're not a couple, probably because of the passive aggressive punishment?

i just needed to clear the air

so, on the upside, guess who is coming for christmas?!



yes, the rightfully craziest woman i know! my grandmother ..... she will (in spanish) call you a dirty pig, and make you fresh tortillas, all in the same breath! she believes in gypsies and curses, folklore, and prays her rosary. she sometimes wear her slippers to mass because her feet are so comfy, she forgets to put on the church shoes. once she left her poor beta in the sink after changing the fish's water ... poor sucker hyperventilated in the sink for hours before being rescued! and she has a 20+ year old bird, that she tends to daily, ... each day, cleaning the cage and changing the food and water for fresh. and she's mean too! that's just part of her charm! maybe you're not suppose to say some things about your grandmother, but, this is also a woman that chased me with a stick when i was little. she flies in from arizona on december 10th, but i won't see her until christmas time ... i hope we make some tamales together ....

personal note on the stocking. i decorated it. yes, it's cheap felt and cheap do-dads from michael's .... assembled by me with the trusty gluegun. in my other life, i would never be this kind of crafty.

and, have you ever noticed that the traditional colors of christmas and the mexican flag are the same?

greetings from the neighborHood

i really do love where i live. it's constantly interesting .... such as, my next door neighbors. their backyard faces the west side of my apt. and, this is the lovely view from my bedroom window ....



almost everyday, when school is let out, the backyard fills with about 5 kids, screaming and playing. it is loud, but i don't mind at all. the mystery is, who lives in this house? the only thing i do know, is there is a perpetual tin can stash in the backyard.



about every two weeks, it sort of disappears. i don't know if the cans are recycled or put in the trash cans. and, i don't know how this household produces sooooo many cans .... many of the larger beer can variety.

something i discovered just in time, is my apt. house is surrounded by pecan trees. the weather has changed, and we've had a couple days of rain, and then some good wind. and then ... the pecan showers! almost every tree on the property is pecan!
i spent some time yesterday afternoon wandering around the yard with a plastic grocery bag, collecting the yummies.



they're delicious! of course, i had to bring them home, as it's a great holiday for pecans, and i don't have a nutcracker.

tomorrow is thanksgiving, and the birthday of a dear friend. he deserves only the best!



happy birthday mark!